Archive for the ‘Roswell’ Category

Happy Spring/Matzah/Freedom/Passover Holiday!

March 29, 2010

Happy Passover to the unleavened among us! A totally legitimate excuse to drink at least four glasses of wine and watch tv while snacking on matzah and charoset, mmmmmm. Go ahead, pour some cabernet for the homies who didn’t make it out of slavery and join me in a glass!

Holding up the ‘tube side of the equation is today’s viewing choice, the season three Roswell episode “I Married An Alien” in which Isabel has an extended fantasy of her married life based on Samantha and Darren’s in Bewitched. (BTW, superficial similarities abound between Bewitched and Mad Men if you care to see them, which I do, because Samantha is awesome and I’m the one viewer on earth who still likes Betty Draper.)

In fantasy land Isabel makes effortless magic French Toast, while in “real life” she burns the crap out of it and fails to strain the seeds out of her fresh squeezed OJ. Her husband, Jesse, looks bemused and frustrated as she pours syrup over his toast. (Side note: Who does that? Everyone likes a different amount of syrup!)

It got me thinking about something my Grandsire used to say, which is that you should always live with someone before you marry them. His supporting anecdote was that when they first married my Grandmother insisted on making a full breakfast when all he wanted was some fruit, leading to arguments which never would have happened if they’d lived together before. Now on the one hand, this makes no sense, since they probably would have just fought about it while living together, and on the other hand, there’s always the option of fixing your own fucking breakfast! It’s revolutionary yet true! And while it makes sense that that might not have been done in the ’50s, it makes no sense that he told me this story unironically in the ’90s.

So to Jesse and all other tv husbands: fix your own food! You really shouldn’t be allowed to run the whole world if you can’t get a handle on feeding yourself.