Underpants, Ejaculating!

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Excerpts from this week’s Nip/Tuck.  Enjoy.

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“You look like you’ve aged 10 years in the past month.” (Totally rude, totally unsolicited commentary from Sean and Julia’s lawyer, directed at Julia. It’s patently false, but a hilariously bitchy statement nonetheless.)

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Julia reciting her ‘mantra’ while Sean injects her with Botox: “Whatever it takes!”

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Sean to Julia after sex: “Well we had to get that out of the way sooner or later.  You’re not gonna get all weird on me now are you?”

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“Oh really, you were thinking of me while you were masturbating into my granddaughter’s panties?”  Not only funny at pure face value as a line, but also hilares because Erica is clearly upset that her Italian stud Renaldo is not masturbating into her panties, and not at all disturbed by how gross and pedophile-y this behavior is nor displaying any kind of human inclination to protect her granddaughter.

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Renaldo the (potential?) pederast to Erica: “My fantasy, it’s still in my head; your fantasy, it’s standing before you.  Who’s sick now, huh?”  (Um, what that does that even mean?  No one thinks boning a young dude when you’re an old lady is as sick as masturbating into a child’s panties dude.  Point not made.  Also, once you ejaculate all over a kid’s undies, the fantasy, it’s no longer safely in your head, it’s a gross physicality now.  The proof, as they say, is in the pudding.)

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“I found him with her underpants ejaculating.”  There should be a comma in there but it’s funnier like this.  Ejaculating underpants!  Heeee.

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Matt to prison rapist with whom he shares a special power top/bottom bitch relationship:  “Do you want a Ho-Ho?  That always makes you feel better.”

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2 Responses to “Underpants, Ejaculating!”

  1. gnatalby Says:

    Some chocolatey goodness would go down good right now…

    Oh you meant a ho-ho Mr. Rapist! I’m with you now! Cuz it sounded like..!!!

    I love your comments about Renaldo’s weird defensiveness. So deluded. I also love how Matt’s cellmate was all indignant: “This is provera! They give this to RAPISTS!” Dude, you ARE a rapist, perhaps you need to come to terms with that…

  2. Sadako Says:

    This post has reminded me that I really need to start watching Nip/Tuck. Like, now.

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